Thursday, April 29, 2010

Sticks and Stones...

Sadly, I have allowed the grains of "sand" to fester and become large pebbles. I have ended up collecting them you see... placing them in my pocket for safe keeping.... I'm not sure if the comments a person I am in contact with are meant to be unkind or if a naivety plays a large part. Normally, my "thick skin" protects my heart... but please... don't point out skin color to try to connect with me. I don't really like that approach... It has become a bit hurtful.

If this is where you have to go to try for my friendship please don't bother.

Am I glad that you are more aware of others around you?
Of course I am...

Do I care that you see someone that looks like us?
No, Not really.

Have I, myself naively opened my mouth with unkind words in my past hoping for a friendship?
Of course... A few weeks after Noah was born I approached another mother. She was white. Her baby was not. I asked when she adopted her baby. She snapped back that she had not adopted. I was so ashamed of my stereotyping... I was so embarrassed. My palms still break to a cold sweat each time I see this mother with her children. I choose my words a bit more carefully these days.

A needed chat with a friend today help me realize that there is a portion of the world that find the adoption world a bit peculiar. And that it's okay... I like this peculiar world I'm in...
So I am going to set this sadness I am holding tightly too go.... set it free and love is incredible life I have been so generously given.
So to sum this whole thing up ladies... "Sticks and Stones!

all photos are by the photo zoo and can be found here


~Mama Lisa~ said...

Oh Kiera, I am so sorry that this happened to you. You are so sweet and so welcoming. Just know you are loved and loving and doing the right things. I love you baby girl. Hugs coming your way.

Love Smithy

Marci said...

I am so sorry as well :) Adoption is a joyous journey that not everyone understands. My parents would get asked all the time which ones were adopted and my mom would say, "I can't remember!" Because really what difference does it make? I was reading something on today about adoption and one of the mom's said of her child, "She was born in my heart and not my uterus." I hate it when people ask about my "real" parents because my parents are my "real" parents. Nothing can convince me otherwise!

~Mama Lisa~ said...

Well said, thanks Marci.

Denette said...

Yes Marci, well said!!

McAtee Family said...

Marci - I love what you said about "real" parents. That comment drives me crazy. My mom and dad are my real parents and I am their real child.

kristin elaine said...

It matters not where your children originate. What matters is that they are loved unconditionally. Your children have that love. I am proud to call you my friend and I am amazed at your strength.
As always, you are in my prayers.

Jill said...

Beautifully said Kiera! I couldn't agree more. Being adopted is certainly a part of my kids, but it does NOT define them.

Thanks for the email on Facebook and no, I don't think you're crazy. Send me your email and I'll invite you to my blog.

Your new friend,